The Reality of The 90 Day Fiance' Before The 90 Days Cast

Who will make it to America for The Other Way?

• LISA / DANIEL
• LAURA / BIRKAN
• LAURA / MICHAL
• ELISE / JOSHUA

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90 day fiancé

Episode 13 – aired 3/8/2026

Once upon a long time ago, I was an international fiancée myself, so I know how this process works firsthand—and trust me, it doesn’t always end the way relationships on 90 Day Fiancé make it seem.

Let’s be honest for a moment. Reality TV is entertainment, and entertainment needs drama to keep viewers watching so the show can go on and on. Which raises an interesting question: when it comes to casting, do producers deliberately choose people who may not be exactly who they claim to be?

After watching the first 12 episodes of 90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days, the couples have had plenty of time to either come clean or begin building real trust. So now I’m weighing in.

Based on everything we’ve seen so far, I’m sharing my thoughts on where each relationship stands as of Episode 13, which aired on March 8, 2026.

My hope is that this perspective helps the next person considering a K-1 visa with someone they may not truly know yet.

The Ingredients of a Lasting Relationship

If you are truly looking for a respectful and lasting relationship, here are the ingredients that matter most:

 Self-respect

 Honest communication

 Mutual respect and physical intimacy

 The ability to admit when you are wrong

 Letting go of arguments once they are resolved

 Accountability and sincere apologies

And one more important rule: don’t rush into a new relationship right after ending a long-term one. Give yourself time to process the loss. A breakup isn’t just the loss of a person—it’s the loss of routines, habits, and a shared life.

When someone is vulnerable, desperate, or easily manipulated, scammers often find them quickly. They create a brief illusion of love, only to leave their victims with financial loss, emotional grief, and heartbreak.

Who will make it to America to The Other Way?

Lisa and Daniel

Lisa should have known, at her age and with her relationship experiences, that if someone is going to leave you because you are bisexual, have been married five times, or are still legally married, then that person simply isn’t for you, but that's what you were trying to avoid, at least until she was in knee high deep.

Those truths should have been revealed long before she spent thousands of dollars supporting Daniel financially, long before traveling across the world to meet him, and certainly before getting serious with him. Lying by omission is still lying, and it can easily become the deciding factor in whether a relationship survives—unless Daniel is getting more out of the arrangement than he is letting on.

If Daniel expects Lisa to respect his culture and traditions, then he should also respect the American culture and expectations that Lisa lives by. Relationships require compromise. Unfortunately, Lisa appears so desperate for love that she tolerates ongoing disrespect.

Daniel talks about tradition while openly admitting that he is sleeping with another man’s wife. That raises a few questions. How many other women is Daniel communicating with? How many others are sending him money? And how many relationships has he maintained while also dating Lisa?

Yes, his culture may allow him to marry more than one woman at a time, but American culture does not. So whose rules matter most? In reality, they both do.

Without fully understanding Daniel’s culture or family dynamics, how can we be sure his uncle isn’t part of the scams many Nigerians have unfortunately been associated with? Daniel is no model, and Lisa doesn’t exactly seem to be his type either. Do you see it too?

Let’s say they marry and Lisa continues sending money. What happens then? Does Daniel stay in Nigeria so he can marry someone else—perhaps another American willing to support him financially?

In the end, this comes down to Lisa’s self-respect and what she truly wants for her future. As she moves closer to retirement, she will need to rely on her savings and investments to support herself, her health, her family, and hopefully enjoy the rewards of retirement—not support someone else indefinitely.

Laura and Birkan

Oh boy. I really thought Laura would be different.

She comes across as educated and self-respecting. When she learned about Birkan’s debt and gambling addiction, she immediately questioned why he was pursuing an American woman—perhaps for financial help or better opportunities.

That was the right instinct.

Birkan should also ask himself an important question: why enter a serious relationship when you are not financially stable enough to date someone properly, prove your reliability, and demonstrate that you can contribute equally to the relationship?

But after Birkan essentially told Laura that her happiness was not important—by disrespecting her long friendship with Michal—the bigger question becomes: is he really worth it?

In my opinion, absolutely not.

Laura, go home. Give yourself time to grieve the loss of what you thought this relationship could be, then move forward. Focus on your health, finish your weight-loss journey, get your surgery if that’s your plan, and then find the man who truly values you.

Right now, Birkan is making you feel like he’s a prize simply because you’ve already expressed your love and give in to him too easily. That’s manipulation. Love can be blind, and Birkan seems extremely insecure—perhaps for good reason.

I hope you listen to Michael.

Elise and Joshua

Joshua told you he was living with his parents, Elise. What were you thinking?

Then the truth comes out: he’s actually living with a female friend. Are you really going to be okay with that lie?

You don’t need to search overseas for a partner. You could easily find a successful man here in the United States who treats you the way your father treats your mother. Joshua is unlikely to change, so don’t waste your energy trying to reshape him into someone he’s not.

And one more thing—if the moment when you invited him into your room while barely dressed was for the cameras, it sent the wrong message. When someone presents themselves as a sex object, they often end up being treated like one.

Javon and Annylyn

Javon, you waited six years to meet your wife—even though you had already been married for three?

If you truly intended to spend your life with her, that timeline makes very little sense. The only explanation would be that the marriage ceremony was symbolic and not legally binding, even though the show portrays it as real.

Either way, something about this story doesn’t add up.

Annylyn, Javon is seeing you for who you really are and not the sweet person you portray yourself to be online, and this is why you get to know someone before committing to a lifelong relationship, and two different cultures should wait longer through the religious holidays and cultural differences to learn if the other can live that way for a lifetime. But when you put yourself in an array of real-life situations, your partner can see how you would react to it and never get too comfortable. Annylyn wants control and to lessen Javon’s masculinity. She's acting like a spoiled brat.

Emma and Zied

Zied comes across as self-centered, egotistical, and frankly lacking common sense.

Emma, on the other hand, you are a catch—but keeping secrets from someone you claim to love is never a good foundation for a relationship. And if you’re rebounding from Mohammad, that will only hurt you in the long run.

Sometimes the best relationships are closer to home. Let one of your friends set you up with a local man who actually deserves you.

Rick and Trish

Hidden truths that only surface after the relationship becomes serious are never a good way to start something that’s supposed to last.

Some secrets, once revealed, never fully disappear. They linger in the background and often resurface during arguments and disagreements.

Honestly, I would have had more respect for Rick if he had come clean at the same time Trish admitted what she had been doing during the days she disappeared. Will she get over his misunderstanding of her absence, or will she take accountability for her actions?

Transparency matters.